Birthday Brownies

My successes and shortcomings with gluten-free, egg-free baking are well archived here.

• Awesome - apple crumble
• Bummer - praline pecan pie
• Crazy good - maple pecan bars
• Crazy bad - pumpkin pie brownies

For months I trolled food websites and blogs for recipes I could manipulate because I loved dessert.  Loved.  I love no more. 

Cupcakes are still great.  Bread pudding lives on in my memories.  But I don't crave dessert anymore.  Do I envy people freely eating cookies?  Will I want a bite of coconut cake after Easter dinner?  Sure but it's not worth it.  I don't even bother looking at dessert menus anymore.  Now popsicles and fruit satisfy my sweet tooth.

Last week, the boy gifted The Allergen-Free Baker's Handbook to me as a birthday present.  I made these brownies.  Gluten-free and vegan.  Instead of using pre-mixed GF baking flour, I made my own per the suggestion of the author.  They are fudgy and full of chocolate chips.  The flavor is slightly different from the original versions but still really good.  Warm one up and add ice cream - you can't tell the difference.

All Choked Up

13.1 miles  • 2:37:38

For the first time in 15 weeks, I have not run.  I have not blogged.  Granted the work week was long and intense, I could (would) not take time to summarize my experience at the Publix Half Marathon.  Maybe I don't want it to be over.  Maybe I have some regrets about training.  Maybe I'm just tired.

the race: beginning
I was up at 5am eating granola with soy milk and drinking water.  Studying the weather channel and tweeting about the race.  I stepped on to Marietta St. around 6:40 greeted by lines of cops on motorcycles, 18,000 other runners, and wheelchair racers preparing to start.

I got choked up.  Migrating to the start line with the rest of Corral M, a lump formed in my throat.  The tears were close behind but I told them to calm down, I have a long way to go.  I ran the first mile in 12 minutes as planned.  Between miles 2 and 9.5 it all seemed like an average long run.  I took on every hill and maintained a 11:30 pace.  I was happy.

Heel-striking through Piedmont Park

the race: end
I expected a challenge through the last 3 miles because of my tough 10-miler during training.  The pain and aches came quickly as I followed the turns and curves through GA Tech.  I started the race alternating 10 minutes running/1 minute walking then slowed to 6 minutes running/2 or 3 minutes walking.  It felt like someone was tightening screws in my quads.

Twelfth mile: I got choked up.  The lump was back carrying a load of emotions I squelched at the start.  And while I planned to jog the entire last mile I couldn't find the physical or mental energy to do it.  I ran as much as I could.  I clapped to motivate myself.  Screamed, let's go!  A few strides from the end I fought the urge to cry.

I finished my first half marathon.  Arms up, head down.  Shocked that it was over.

A Girl's First Expo

I went to the Health & Fitness Expo to pick up my race packet.  Bib, race t-shirt, and some tasty edibles are in my possession.  Publix had an enormous display of organic fruits and fresh breads.  I quickly walked past stacks of yummy loaves so not to tempt myself into devouring one on the showroom floor. 

I perused the Gu table and shuttered just thinking about consuming the gel during a race.  People swear by the stuff but I'm not ready to try it.  One day though.  Of course I picked up some snack size Larabars.  I'm packing one in my Spibelt to snack on during miles 6-13.

Ceiling of Georgia Dome from the inside

Walking into the Dome I was intimidated, surrounded by what I assumed were seasoned distance runners.  Somewhere amongst the exhibition stations I lost that anxiousness.  I began seeing all ages, all ethnicities and all body types picking up packets.  Surely there were novices around me.  I'm proud to a newbie runner.  Not sure why but I really happy about it.

The options for running gear and accessories were endless.  New Balance and Vibrams hybrid.  Bamboo activewear.  Saucony shoes.  Headbands.  Bumper stickers.  I could've outfitted a whole new closet with enough shorts, tops and shoes to wear something different everyday for six months.

Less than 7 hours from now, I'll be eating a bowl of granola and working through my nerves.

Me at Expo; Race day clothes

Countdown: 1 Day

Instead of dining out last night, I made nice with the couch and iced my knee.  The boy made dinner.  Steak, as he knows, is not my favorite, never has been. I rarely ate beef as a kid because my parents didn't like the idea of cows being fed hormones and antibiotics.  As a result, I never really craved it and easily transitioned into a vegetarian diet.

Now as an omnivore I'm not always comfortable eating meat.  Compared to eating vegetables, tofu and grains, chewing meat is work.  But I'll do the chewin' if it's grass-fed or from a fine dining steakhouse.

<< Check out last night's dinner:

•  Baked potato with salt, pepper and butter
•  Spicy braised rapini aka broccoli rabe
•  Steak (took me 2 hours to eat)


I have friends that have shied away from potatoes when trying to lose weight but potatoes are so healthful and delicious even when lightly seasoned (sans sour cream, cheese, and bacon).  Check out this baked potato preparation; it's the best.  If you like broccoli, and haven't tried it already, buy some broccoli rabe.  Despite it's distinct bitter taste it's good when cooked with olive oil, shallots, and red pepper flakes.

Even with mixed feelings about meat, I'm always proud of a meal primarily composed of real, whole foods.  The only processed components were butter and olive oil.  Carbohydrates, vegetables, fat, and protein are all covered here without relying on a manufacturer's flavored/preserved/boxed goods.  Cheers to real food.

Oh, and the big race is tomorrow!

Countdown: 2 Days

Only two days left until I run the Publix half marathon so my training program was light this week.  I've been paying more attention to my first mile.  I don't want the adrenaline of this massive race to overwhelm me and then be out of gas by the eighth mile.

My goal is to finish, hopefully in less than 2:45.  This week I kept the first mile around 12 minutes as practice for Sunday.  It was a painful forcing myself to run that pace.  My legs ached and overall I felt awkward.  But I know it'll all pay off this weekend.  The countdown (hydration, icing and rest) continues.

this week's runs
         2 miles • 24:10 • 12:07 pace
         3.38 miles •  40:37 • 12:01 pace

Running Fuel

I put in extra effort this week to eat real foods in preparation for my first half.  Breakfast was a banana with peanut butter or granola with soy milk.  For lunch I had stir-fried vegetables (spinach, broccoli, red peppers) with shrimp and pesto.  Dinner has been a mix of homemade dishes and to-go meals including massaman curry with jasmine from Doc Chey's.

I think I may be a rice addict.  This a new realization because as a child I hated rice.  It was only good if you added butter or gravy and it was never good as leftovers.  That rice-hating little girl is gone.  She gone!

On Monday, I found this recipe on the Food & Wine site.  It requires a little prep but once you start putting items on the oven it comes together quickly.  Here's my adaptation.

ingredients

2 1/2 cups basmati rice, freshly cooked

2 T vegetable oil

2 T fish sauce

2 limes, juiced

1 1/2 t sugar

3 carrots, peeled and 

1/2 English cucumber, cut into 1/4 inch half moons

4 scallions, chopped

Cilantro to taste

Cayenne pepper to taste

2 salmon fillets

Salt and pepper to taste

make it

1. Preheat the broiler.

2. In a large bowl mix lime juice, fish sauce, cayenne, sugar, and 1 T oil.  Add rice, stir and let sit.

3. Coat fish with remaining oil, season with salt and pepper.  Cook under the broiler for approximately 5 minutes.

4. Use peeler to make ribbons with the carrots. Cut ribbons into thirds.

5. Add carrots, cucumber, scallions, and cilantro to the rice.  Add salt and pepper as needed.

6. Plate fish over a heaping scoop of rice.  Eat it up!

The Hills

When you land in Kansas City you are touching down in the definition of the Midwest.  Cows and flatness.  You can see ahead for at least a mile.  I don't know a place within Atlanta's perimeter that resembles a scene like MCI airport.  This city is a series of hills.  A crest then trough.  A valley then a mountain.  And sometimes it makes me tired.

10 Miles • 1:56 • 11:39 pace

I mapped my last long run through areas that I usually drive.  Fact: you will not an environment until you explore it on foot.  Fact: 10th St is (possibly) the manifestation of running hell on earth.  It is over 2 miles uphill across the interstate, past Turner, and through Georgia Tech with no relief.  With half a mile until my first turn I considered changing my route but I dragged on.

Somewhere near Star Provisions the sidewalk turned into gravel and worn down grass.  At another turn I found orange cones and cops directing traffic.  I unknowingly headed into a race - the ShamRock 'N Roll.  And another two monster hills.

Eight miles in, with aching knees, I was home drinking water and eating part of an orange.  Stopping home wasn't on my initial route so I improvised the last two miles.  I headed east straight into a hill.  I could not (would not) climb another so I ran west, downhill.  Which only led to another incline in less than a quarter mile.  Who knew I lived in a valley?!  I didn't know until I ran the streets.

FOOD
The countdown to 13.1 began today.  Hopefully I'll have time to blog about my pre-race eats.

Salmon with Thai Rice Salad

I Am Going Outside

     ‘I am just going outside and may be some time.’
     The others nod, pretending not to know.
     At the heart of the ridiculous, the sublime.

                                         - Antarctica, Derek Mahon

My senior year I registered for an Irish poetry class.  There were three major highlights: the professor chanted Yeats, his wife invited us to their home for a Jamaican-inspired dinner, and Derek Mahon's Antarctica.   The poem is heartbreakingly beautiful.   And while I am not a self-sacrificing man wading through a blizzard, I now know what it's like to go outside "and be some time".

recent runs

        •  Feb. 22 - 2 miles - 22:51 (11:25)
        •  Feb. 26 - 8 miles - 1:31:51 (11:29)

        •  Mar. 01 - 2 miles - 21:13 (10:36) 

        •  Mar. 03 - 5.5 miles - 1:03:45 (11:35)

        •  Mar. 06 - 9 miles - 1:42:41 (11:24)

        •  Mar. 09 - 2 miles - 21:11 (10:35)

There's only 11 days until my half.  I'm really excited, and confident that I can complete the 13.1 without wanting to die.

Pumpkin Pie Brownies

Between mid-week long runs and the new job, I have been too pooped to cook.  I relied on the boy, Whole Foods hot bar, and Chipotle to feed me the past three weeks.

I spent four hours in the kitchen on Saturday.  First, I decorated my floors with flour and xanthan gum for these gluten-free, vegan brownies.  Then I filled my apartment with the smell of cinnamony granola and unleashed garlic fury with some hummus.  Two ripe avocados found their way into guacamole this afternoon.

Now, the refrigerator is fully stocked with homemade goodies.

Back to the brownies!  A printout of this recipe has been camping on my kitchen counter since November and hasn't moved.  I baked these as a farewell to the cold season.  Pumpkin layered over bittersweet brownie?  Yes, please.

They look good but taste bad.  I don't think it was the recipe's fault.  It was probably the less than palatable light soy milk I accidentally purchased.  Think of liquified cardboard, low fat liquid cardboard.  That's light soy milk.  Guess I have to stick with the 365 brand of mango popsicles for dessert.  I'm okay with that.

A Runner's Envy

I tried on running capris last week because shorts are not working.  I looked at my profile.  I faced myself in the mirror.  I jogged inside the fitting room.  Then my eyes started the critique.  Look at that bump and that lump.  Shouldn't they be thinner by now?  Maybe after the race you'll lose weight.  The laundry list of mental complaints would have continued if I hadn't left the store.  I came for pants but got an emotional beatdown.

The envy is not gone.  I found it in the fitting room and if someone would destroy it, I would be grateful.

I see lean female runners and wonder.  What didn't I do?  What do they do?  Prior to training I read in multiple places, including here, that people don't always lose weight preparing for endurance races.  Of course I convinced myself that surely I would lose some weight in 15 weeks.  But no.  So I remind myself that my body is stronger and more efficient to dull the nagging thoughts that I didn't train hard enough.

There are only 17 days until my first half and I'm recommitting myself to my program.  The WHOLE program.  Cross-training fell to the bottom of the priority list during December but I'm bringing it back. If you need me in the next couple of weeks, you can find me crunching, pushing and squatting.  Envy is not invited!